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The Women's Role in the Home

I need to know how the church of christ views a woman or a mother working outside the home and the views on a woman becoming something other than a mother?

Submitted by TW on August 8, 1998

Answer: (Given by Bro. Brian Tipton)

My name is Brian Tipton. I am a Christian, and a member of the congregation of the Lord's church that meets in Quartz Hill, California. I am glad that you are seeking a biblical answer to your question. So many people go through their lives, never seeking the knowledge that comes from the Word of God.

I am not sure if you are asking this as a member looking from the inside of the church or from the outside looking in. Whatever reason, I intend to give a Biblical answer. As you may or may not know, the church of Christ does not consider itself a denomination. The bible has no room for more than one body of Christ. As such, we do not have creeds or man-made documents that we use to justify our worship practices and daily lives.

That does not mean that everyone in the church agrees on every subject, though. What I say may be different from what you have heard before, but it comes from my understanding of the scriptures. I challenge you to read what I say, search the scriptures for yourself and arrive at your own understanding. This is very important since the apostle Paul said that you are to,

. . . work out your own salvation with fear and trembling. - (Php 2:12)

We are to work out our own salvation in fear and trembling because we realize that the decisions we make will affect the outcome of our souls after death. Having said that, here is the way I understand the subject.

There are only a few passages in the bible that deal with a woman's role in the home and the relationship she has to her family.

In Proverbs, Chapter 14, the first verse, the teacher wrote:

Every wise woman buildeth her house: but the foolish plucketh it down with her hands.

We see here that one of the roles of a wise woman is to build here house. And in fact we will find that it is here primary concern! Let's read Proverbs 31:10-24,

(10)Who can find a virtuous woman? for her price is far above rubies. (11) The heart of her husband doth safely trust in her, so that he shall have no need of spoil. (12) She will do him good and not evil all the days of her life. (13) She seeketh wool, and flax, and worketh willingly with her hands. (14) She is like the merchants' ships; she bringeth her food from afar. (15) She riseth also while it is yet night, and giveth meat to her household, and a portion to her maidens. (16) She considereth a field, and buyeth it: with the fruit of her hands she planteth a vineyard. (17) She girdeth her loins with strength, and strengtheneth her arms. (18) She perceiveth that her merchandise is good: her candle goeth not out by night. (19) She layeth her hands to the spindle, and her hands hold the distaff. (20) She stretcheth out her hand to the poor; yea, she reacheth forth her hands to the needy. (21) She is not afraid of the snow for her household: for all her household are clothed with scarlet. (22) She maketh herself coverings of tapestry; her clothing is silk and purple. (23) Her husband is known in the gates, when he sitteth among the elders of the land. (24) She maketh fine linen, and selleth it; and delivereth girdles unto the merchant. (25) Strength and honour are her clothing; and she shall rejoice in time to come. (26) She openeth her mouth with wisdom; and in her tongue is the law of kindness. (27) She looketh well to the ways of her household, and eateth not the bread of idleness. (28) Her children arise up, and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praiseth her. (29) Many daughters have done virtuously, but thou excellest them all. (30) Favour is deceitful, and beauty is vain: but a woman that feareth the LORD, she shall be praised. (31) Give her of the fruit of her hands; and let her own works praise her in the gates. (Proverbs 31:10-24)

This is one of the most beautiful passages in the bible. It describes a woman that is truly worthy of praise. Let's look a few of the above verses:

Verses	Description
15, 21, 25-27	In these verses, we see that the Wife of noble character takes care of her family. In fact, this is what the teacher, King Lemuel, praises her for first. He praises her because she selflessly rises before the others and prepares food for them and those who depend on her. She keeps here family clothed. She is dignified, speaks with wisdom, and watches over the affairs of her household.
30, 20	The wife of Noble character also fears the Lord, keeping his commandments. She also is merciful because she opens her arms to the poor and helps the needy.
16, 18, 24	These are the verses that may be of most interest to you. Not only do we see that the wife of noble character handles her finances well, buying and selling fields at her own decision, she works at making things and selling them for a profit. This sounds like work to me. But it is work that she can do while maintaining watch over her family, which comes first.

Now, having said that I must also say this (and sometimes people get mad, but they get mad at the bible, not me. I don't make this up). Let's look at Eph. 5:22,

Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord. (Eph. 5:22)

and in Eph 5:24

Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing. (Eph. 5:24)

Wives must submit to their husbands because they are the head of the house (Eph 5:23). However, we also know that the husband must love his wife. Let's look at Eph 5:33,

Nevertheless let every one of you in particular so love his wife even as himself; and the wife see that she reverence her husband. (Eph. 5:33)

Although there is nothing wrong with a woman working outside the home, it would be wrong for any woman to work outside the home, and because of her job, neglect her family. It is a decision that you and your husband must make together out of love and respect for each other. If your husband has a problem with it (I don't know if he does), the topic should be shelved for a while (maybe some time), and let him consider it. And tell him, that that is the reason you are doing it.

So the answer to your question is yes, it is alright for a woman to work outside the home or to become more than a wife and mother. But this comes with a catch! Whatever you decide, remember this: The Bible teaches that the woman should place first things first, and I believe the order is clear:

God and the Church
Her Family
Her Career

It is difficult to do all three effectively, but it can be done as we read in Proverbs. Make sure you make your decision from this biblical standpoint with your family first in your mind.

May God bless you in your studies of his word!

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